Just Livin My Life

So the new thing is to say "I'ma do me," "I can only be me," and other things of that nature.

Okay.

*Ponders for a second*

Aren't we stating the obvious? There is no one else you can be. There is no other life you can live. Not even if you really wanted to. These proclamations are stupid. Stating the obvious does not make you appear to be intelligent or a deep thinker. It makes you look dumb. Just because a musician puts it in their song does not mean you have say it every chance you get. When you say it its one thing, when an artist says it its another thing. I mean it is artistic expression. You can't take every article of clothing off the runway and wear it on the street. (Some of that couture stuff will have you looking like an idiot.) Same concept. Not everything needs to be repeated. Some art is just art, leave it there. I will be happy when this fad fades. No kudos.

"Im the realist you ever met!!"

You know how they have these television shows proclaiming that the footage they display is reality? Well, sometimes I feel that they are reality. Stay with me; hear me out. See in immediate surroundings there are people all around me exclaiming just how real they are, but what they end up being is messy, shallow, and fake. Have you experienced this as well? So, these television shows are in fact showing reality. The reality of just how 'real' a lot of people are.

Why did I bring this up????

I recently left my college town because I was suffocating in the artificial air. Everything around me was crazy. Its like I was living in a parallel universe. I just had to get out. So, anyway, I was recollecting on the past 5 years and questioning how I made it through those years. My answer: My daily dose of real. Maybe it wasn't daily but it was often enough to ensure my survival. It did not begin immediately. 2005 sometime. He was what kept me sane. All it took sometimes was just a simple hello to let me know that I am not the only person here. I am not legend. Real does exist here. Did exist here. All that I knew that was real is now gone, along with my sanity, and along with me. My surroundings have changed. I am now with the truest, realist people I have ever seen: Mi Familia.

Maybe one day I will be able to catch up with the one that got me through college. Hopefully, he has not succumb to that fallacy of realness that was being force fed to us in that college town. Hopefully, he still has his sanity. That'd be nice.








Goin off on tangents once more... in a sunkissed kind of way..

"Runaway Love"

I've been told that it is never okay to runaway from your problems, or from anything for that matter. But why is that? Why is it not okay to run away? Is it better to stay and suffer? I have been deliberating with this for quite a while now, because I am thinking of running away. I have had some circumstances, situations, maladaptive relationships in my current town. Now that I am graduating I can not wait to leave. In my mind, I will be leaving behind all of the memories of the bad times. Not too mention all of those people that I would not mind forgetting. Does that speak negatively on my character that I would rather leave a situation than remain in it and be miserable? I really think this situation is different than when people try to runaway from themselves. This ain't me. These people here are crazy and shady.
I have never runaway from a challenge, a fight, or any other bad situation before. But after spending five years in shark city I am tired. There has been way more bad experiences than good. Is it wrong for me to want to leave? Why is it that everyone around me keeps telling me to stick it out? There is nothing to stick out. Stick it out is something you say to someone that is in a bad situation that they have to be in for some odd period of time. I have stuck it out. I'm done. It is over. I have been waiting to peace out of this place for years. Once I get that chance you want to make me feel like a coward for taking advantage of my freedom. Well, eff that. I'm out.
This is my life. My life. Let me rephrase that. This life is mine. I will live it as I wish. Why must the people around me try to navigate my life for me, then get disappointed when I venture off course. Who's life are we talking about again? Oh yeah, thats right, it's mine. Let me do me. Please, don't try to pressure me. I don't do well with pressure. I am stubborn. I will do what I feel is best for me. Thank you for your concern. I appreciate it. You do not need to repeat anything to me, I heard you. Trust that I have my best interests in mind as well.

I do want to leave and I gotta go right now................


Random Ramblings of Bree